the met's annual fashion thunderdome... the met costume gala... which depressingly so is the only place it's frowned upon to have a "stylish and sleek" outfit- if you don't GO BIG you go home...
well thank god at least for one night a year the rest of the world is into the OHMYGAWD amazing confections and pretensions tossed around like a cheap hooker on the JV football teams game bus...
well who made it their bitch? let's get to the WEEERRRRKK looks first.
not very many I'm afraid- as when bitches like Nicki Manaj go conservative in Tommy Hilfiger?!... I want to crawl further under the covers more underwhelmed than finding out whomever is cast in the next scary movie franchise... ya- that's... depressing/ what the fuck happened this year? Only one bitch had a breakout yes ma'am I stand up and clap for you in surprise and excitement moment and it was Anne Hathaway PERIOD. THE HOUSE DOWN. In vintage Valentino.... need I say more?
THE MOMENT OF THE ENTIRE EVENT
ANNE ANNE ANNE ANNE ANNE ANNE ANNE....
beyonce did it last year but good step and repeat on it Naomie I guess? Donna K... ?
Anja Rubik- I don't care that I don't know you prior to looking at you. Anthony Vaccarelloyes... yes yes aaaand yes. you daring modern day Nancy don't need Sid working it bad bitch. let's get whiskey together and you would. I like it
She holds a position with Vogue.. you're serious? I don't care WHAT the label says... EVER. I challenge my clients when I present something fresh- I don't care if it's Salvation Army stumbling across an Edwarian 1940s jewel... or a Givenchy haute couture.... Chanel and Dior on you two... a Bee.. or the letter C as a grade... oh dammit call me satan in stripper heels- because you have neither anything Devilish panache or elegance to even tag the word Prada. you're boring to me it's winter already in the icy artless house of Wintour...
My gorgeous Coco.... YES YES AND YES!!!! Fausto Puglisi en Enguangro... YES... Coco... I can't wait for us to have playdates... I love her- she has "it" gets "it"... you're canvas I want to paint and play with...
Joan Smalls in Tom Ford- nothing "moment worthy" not nothing noteworthy expect for... good job not going into either category essentially... how innovative Mr. Ford... black lace gown... laser cut it, use children's saliva for all I care.. it's there. just nothing... exciting or horrible
Karolina... with a name like yours every designer pawing to have their garments draped on you... I'm- dissapointed. Last year- you had a MOMENT... right there with Beyonce weeerking the shit out of that incredible train. Dissapoint Ms. K...
::head shaking::
I don't even want to continue on this Katy Perry Dolce... where was Gabanna? you two defiantly had a Pharoh fight.
ok- LaLa first- your welcome being invited to this posh affair... and no honey bunny someone hated you to suggest that was a flattering... or worthy choice for the fashion thunder-dome... that Zac Posen possibly wasn't made out of spite.. it just was not for you. at all. not today. not tomorrow... just... my underwhelming and depressing apologies my dear..
Madonna. now really.... the last moment I enjoyed last was probably... after you had that baby with your Cuban babydaddy.. in the Black titty plunging number at the MTV awards with elbow length black gloves yes hooooney. you just look like O.G Vivienne... my god does punk only translate to plaid?...
get with it or hire someone who impresses you. or maybe you're that east to which case- I'm hollering for Madge... she kinda needs me.. and is trying to figure out her next "look"... and someone isn't serving it to you. tracy anderson made your arms that atrocity first. now this? oh madgers....
as she should and does and delivers... madame sarah posh parker. just take away Jessica anymore. not needed hitting the beautiful Giles Deacon with the Philip Treacy headpiece (why more didn't opt for a Treacy-esque moment.. he hits it there with Westwood for your little cutesey "punkey" attempts people... Riccardo I know you were more chuckling with a chagrin than excited of what was brought to the table. one word. beyonce period. were you trying to make her look cut off and stumpy? mission accomplished. bounce a suarter off of Beyonce isn't quite back yet- so that wasn't nice. I love that you are all touching the ooh- elbow length gloves just now. (I screamed about it all last year with the J. Mendell coral number to even staying along with a yawn during your Burgundy boring color continuity phase with a saphire awaiting gaze... Kerry W.. whoop di do...
Katie Holmes whatever the fuck anyone says... the hem and train on this Calvin Klein number?...
YES
YES
YEEESS!!!! Dagging is what this is called my little white sheep... and don't worry maybe in 20014 you'll shy closer to it... I designed my iconic ...the.PERFECT... first piece- my leather jacket piece a few years ago with that incorporation... so Katie- my snaps and yeessss to church all day for the dare to wear. but a suggestion would only be= ok is to have had that piece dyed just a thought- to have complimented your piece.. purple or sapphire anything with gunmetal. (love gunmetal with sapphire)I love that you said yes. claps and snaps and werk.
when you have a name to slut out such as:
Beyonce
J. Lo
and Nicki...
THIS is the result? AND someone was paid to do this?!??? Lord and gods of garb above me... I can't wait for a good slutty name so that a moment can reoccur... some firing and hiring needs to be done. period. cut print. tweet it believe it read it. exclamation point. (case in point.. gimme a diva I don't care I'll show them a look and their hair flipping don't look me in the eyes NDA's will drop I swear..)
let's reminise in another 2012 moment... Karolina... yes ma'am last year... this year. downgrade.. I'm afraid. guess you should have stuck to or do stick to your laurels of resting on that face... the face- right?
this was a last year Moooment. you have those stairs as your arrival... Beyonce you uuused them last year.... yes ma'am. guilty as making the bitches look stuuupid.
last year
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